Bird As Fish

Oh God, sometimes the urge comes on stronger than ever and all I want is to be loved, to be held, to not struggle, and my Buddhist stance must be denied, for my whole being craves. Craves. Consuming. Like tears coursing down a waterfall, unstoppable, beating, churning. Run your finger lightly down my nose, across my lips, for I am a being too. A being of fire.

Douse the fire! Douse it with tears! Put it out! Keep it out of sight until...And I never know what I am waiting for. When everything will be safe again, when I can come out to rest, come out to breathe.

If I fight long enough I may be consumed, yield to this fury of force. Consume me as I stand in your way. Unbearable flames of heat long pent up awaiting daylight and I feel a wisp on my cheek. Oh take me away.

Wait for me. The fire whispers at the gates, licks up the doors and I am inside wondering how it ever got this far and everything in me is dreading.

Hold tightly. I forget the feel of human hands, since horror took me away. Half my stature just machine, and everything in me is longing.

Wait for me. Hold tightly. And pray that I never fall off.

© 2003 All rights reserved MJ Jackson
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